Same Word, Different Meanings

I talk to my grandma once a week. On our last conversation, she informed me her church was having a crusade.

Me: “What do you mean by crusade?”

Grandma: “Don’t you know what a crusade is?”

Me: “I know what it means in a historical sense, but I doubt a bunch of Oklahoma Baptists are about to invade the Levant on Sunday night.”

She thought that was highly amusing.

Also, a crusade is a fancy name for a revival.

Quick Trip

At the end of last week, The Wife and I flew out to Oklahoma City to visit some of my family. Mostly, I wanted her to get a chance to meet my grandmother. Grandma is 92 and in the very early stages of dementia. I’m not sure how many good years (months) Grandma will have, and I didn’t want to wait.

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  • You know how important this was because I was willing to fly out. I hate flying. Not the actual flying, but I hate TSA and I hate not having my normal set of toys. The former proved itself at the start, because whomever is in charge of Tampa’s TSA agents implemented a customer service initiative they must have borrowed from HK. Just without the basic quality to offset the arrogance.Another lesson learned on this particular trip is never rent a car from Hertz. Especially if all you have is a debit card. Also, the rep’s customer service skills were just slightly above Tampa TSA. Enterprise was more than willing to rent us a vehicle with a debit card and a deposit.
  • The Wife loved the Tucson. I have a feeling that when we get her vehicle paid off, one of those SUVs might end up in our driveway. Plus, CarPlay makes things so much easier.

    Friday, we went to Bombing Memorial. It was quite emotional. If you’re in the OKC area, take a few hours and go. The museum is excellent, and the memorial itself evokes a stark harshness of the event with a dollop of hope. Some events move you by showing the worst and the best in humanity.

    Saturday, I did something I hadn’t done for two decades – I played some Magic: The Gathering. My young nineteen-year-old cousin has become involved in the cardboard crack. I got beat down, but it was fun. My family also got to see me in my kilt, which they enjoyed. Overall, it was a good visit.

    The trip home was uneventful except for TSA needing to pat me down for some reason. Although the OKC folks were much more respectful than Tampa. Feck it. Next time I have to fly, I’m wearing my kilt, and let them deal with that.

    Comments on John Wick

    The Wife and I saw all three John Wick movies last weekend. We had to fast forward through the puppy death in the first one, because The Wife wouldn’t be able to watch the rest of the film otherwise. We enjoyed them, but they are violent – particularly the third.

    So, this comment from The Wife kicked over my giggle box:

    We watched all three of those movies, but they were so ‘roided up, it was like watching six shoot ‘em ups.

    Reasons I Love My Wife

    The Wife has stated on multiple occasions that she hates competing against me at Toastmasters. At our last meeting, the club president ambushed – I mean, asked – if The Wife and I would be evaluators for the two speakers. She agreed without realizing we would be competing against each other. So, you can imagine how pleased she was when she won Best Evaluator.

    And how did my blushing bride of less than a month express her glee? By turning to me, brandishing her ribbon, and in front of the club, declared ”Suck It!”

    It was fucking hilarious! I love my wife.

    Strange New Worlds

    Since The Wife has come into my life, I have not only gone out to shop for various items (as opposed to purchasing online), but I have regularly trekked into places I wasn’t even sure what they sold.

    Places I have been to more in the last eighteen months than in the previous forty years:

    1. TJ Maxx
    2. Hobby Lobby
    3. Ross
    4. Marshall’s
    5. Home Goods

    I’m sure there’s a pattern.

    Marriage Civilizes Man

    I’m mostly commenting on the fact that a simple request from The Wife kept me from verbally taking apart the partisan witch collecting signatures to put an assault weapons ban on the next ballot.

    That woman (the partisan hack, not The Wife) somehow in three sentences spoke more errors than she had words.

    One hopes for a repeat meeting sans civilizing influence.

    No, Derek Really Likes Civ

    The Brother and a couple of mutual friends were talking, and the conversation drifted to video games. The three of them discussed how much time you could put into a game to be considered “hard-core” playing. After bantering it back and forth, the figure of 200 hours in a game was offered up by one of the friends. Since this conversation was via the Internet, decided to pull up my statistics for hours on Civ from Steam.

    “Yeah, Derek’s got about 1,600 hours on Civ 5 and about 1,300 on Civ 6.”

    Yes, I really like Civ. It is one of five video games I play and the only one I play on the computer. One of the requirements when I built my current computer was if it would handle Civ 5, which at the time was the new hotness.

    Before the Wife To Be came into my life, it wasn’t unusual for Saturdays to consist of me playing Civ with my iPad streaming Netflix for oh, twelve hours or so. Now it’s down to two and three block intervals with podcasts.

    Oh well, she’s worth it.

    It’s Looking Like This Wedding Is Getting Serious

    Last week, the invitations went out. The Wife To Be has been informing me daily of the RSVP count. Also last week, the Wife To Be and I went down to the local courthouse and picked up the marriage license. This, of course, necessitated me leaving all my toys in the car. The deputy manning the metal detector asked me to open my little urban kit. When I showed him the contents, he thought my urban kit was nifty.

    We also paid off the venue, and then got me outfitted with a new suit. I’ve needed a new suit since none of my other formal clothes fit me anymore. We also splurged on a pair of fancy dress boots. Because I hate laces, even on my formal shoes.

    The Wife To Be harried off to Plant City for flowers. She’s considerate enough to understand that I’m not really interested in making floral decisions, but to also take my preferences into consideration.

    I have been delegated the task of setting up the wedding playlist. I love technology. It means we don’t have to spend money on a DJ. Especially for a casual reception. The Wife To Be bombarded me with requests, which I duly included, and asked if I would please not make the rest of it metal. I’ve included some metal (because it’s my wedding too), but I’ve duly followed her wishes.

    Less than six weeks to go. Damn, this business is starting to get serious.

    Living With Robots

    The future is funny sometimes. We use Echoes in the house. Yes, I know the security issues and I’ve judged the risk acceptable at this time. What amuses me is some of the “human” failings of the robots.

    Today’s example – We have three Echoes, which with our small house often means two will pick up the verbal command. This morning, my wife orders the bedroom Echo to turn the lights on. No problem. The living room Echo, because of sound changing as it bounces out of the bedroom misheard and proceeds to tell me that there are no alarms set.

    The future is weird.