Category: General

The Song Is Stuck In My Head, and I Can’t Get It Out! Cool!

November 9, 2012 / / 0 Comments

I took my nephew to Cub Scouts last night because his dad was sick. NBD, I’ve done that plenty of times before. As we’re leaving, Nephew starts singing “The Star Spangled Banner.” Badly off-key and losing a lot of the words. So, being the uncle and having access to modern technology, I make him listen to one of the best renditions of our national anthem.

I’m speaking, of course, of Madison Rising’s rendition. I think I felt a little ill when the kid said it was only “Okay.”

Now, the song is stuck in my head and I must burn it out. Thankfully, most of my co-workers are vets, and they still smile when the song is played. Even in good, hard rock style.

Lunch time talk

November 7, 2012 / / 0 Comments

The Brother’s Coworker (reading the local rag): This lady got into a car accident after getting addicted to Xanax

The Brother: Better than getting addicted to car accidents after taking a Xanax

Me: What would the support group for that be like?

The Brother: Those are called demolition derbies.

Pest Eradication Story

November 1, 2012 / / 0 Comments

I’m a little behind on this because I missed a couple weeks of Squirrel Report. The call-in question for the Oct. 18 show was the most spectacular pest eradication. Mine isn’t spectacular, but my friends thought it was funny.

About once a month, I have my friends over for a “smoking party.” Basically, I smoke a piece of meat, usually with the assistancey of one of my friends. We smoke the meat, smoke tobacco, and bullshit. These are usually day-long affairs that usually leave me kind of exhausted.

A few months ago, I kicked out my last two friends and then dragged myself into the shower. After a few minutes soaking in the streams of hot water, I turned, looked up, and then screamed like a little girl. Hanging on the ceiling was a spider maybe six to ten inches across. Big. Damn. Spider.

I leapt out of the shower and grabbed my glasses. Seeing clearly didn’t help things. Big. Damn. Spider. Normally, I try to be rational about things. Insects and spiders (especially large ones) will deactivate my rationality and activate “must kill because of terror” parts of my brain.

This is why my first response was to grab a bottle of roach killer. I aimed and sprayed, expecting the BDS to drop into the shower stall, fidget, and die. No, it decided to charge the spray along the ceiling. I continued to hose the BDS (I think I was screaming obscenities, but I can’t remember). The BDS finally got enough spray and dropped into the bathroom trash can. Hurray serendipity!

The BDS was still moving in the trash can. Rationality was still turned off. Must kill was still turned on. In that state of mind, I came up with a brilliant idea. I use scented candles in the bathroom. The candle had been burning for a while. The jar was half-full of melted wax. New weapon!

The BDS finally curled up and died when a half-jar of melted wax hit it like burning oil on storming peasants. Hurray, victory is mine!

The BDS is still at the bottom of the trash can, encased in hardened, scented wax. Even knowing it’s dead, I can’t bring myself to scrape it out. Maybe the BDS had a small victory in death.

Courtesy Appliance & Refrigeration Experts – Piss Poor Customer Service in Tampa

October 30, 2012 / / 0 Comments

This last Friday (Oct. 26) the freezer stopped freezing at my mom’s place, which is being currently rented out by my other brother and sister-in-law. They called Courtesy Appliance & Refrigeration Experts of Tampa, FL. The tech came out and replaced the compressor on the freezer. Normal suburban stuff. Here’s the fun part.

Saturday (the next day) the freezer was still not working. So, my sister-in-law calls Courtesy Appliance & Refrigeration Experts back. They say they will have a tech out between 12 and 2. Between 2:15 and 2:30 (not sure of the exact time), my sister-in-law calls back and gets the owner of this firm. She asks when the tech is going to come out because they have melting food. His response: his tech will be out there and “quit your fucking bitching,” followed by a hang-up.

This is the point that my brother (not her husband) calls back and confronts the owner. The owner says he didn’t use “fucking,” but everything else was correct. Brother proceeds to inform owner that such language is totally inappropriate. Escalation occurs. Owner’s final response is that he is going to come to the house, yank out his part, give back the money, and to top it all off, bring a deputy to ensure that he is not locked out of the house.

End of story, he never showed back up and we stopped payment on the check. After consulting another firm, it was decided to just purchase another freezer.

So, if this experience is indicative of how that company runs, please do not call Courtesy Appliance & Refrigeration Experts of Tampa FL for your service needs.

New Pocketknife

October 18, 2012 / / 1 Comment

So, I picked up a new pocketknife, mostly because:

A) I got a raise and
B) I like spending money on sharp pointy things made of metal

So I picked up a CRKT 6803Z. I’d been carrying a CRKT M16Z for almost a year. I was surprised how much heftier the new one is.

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So, I’m showing my new knife to The Brother.

The Brother (looking at the blade): Huh, Cricket?

Me: CRKT.

The Brother: Like I said, Cricket.

Me: This is going up on the blog.

Something else to save up for

October 9, 2012 / / 0 Comments

From Topless Robot comes this.

Fortress Maximus is considered the Holy Grail for many Transformers fans; partially because he was (and still is) the biggest Transformer ever released (two feet tall) but partially because if you drink out of him you get eternal life. I doubt the upcoming re-issue of Fortress Maximus in Takara Tomy’s Masterpiece line will have that option, but you can still get a perfectly in-scale recreation of the 1987 toy in March of next year if you don’t mind ponying up $350 here.

Inner Geek hard to suppress. Must save for March. Must own greatest toy from childhood. URGHH!

GRPC Post 6

September 30, 2012 / / 0 Comments

Although there was a lot of good information from the speakers, there were a few that just turned me off. I realize that the base of the gun rights movement is the stereotypical mature, white, Christian conservative male, and that the speakers pissing me off were probably very good for that demographic. That said, that demographic is shrinking as more and more new shooters come into the community.

I’ll post on the panels more as go over my notes.

What did surprise me was the number of people I met while Kenn and I were smoking our cigars. We met a lot of the Florida Carry group. We also met with Paul Lathrop Raquel Okyay from the Politics and Guns podcast. I found out that Raquel is from my neck of the woods, and we both share a burning hatred of Hillsborough County Sheriff David Gee. Kenn even talked to a couple of the guys from Madison Rising.

I swear, if I get to go to another of these, I’m starting a smoking lounge.

GRPC Post 4

September 29, 2012 / / 0 Comments

This is really just me playing with the panorama feature of my phone.

Here’s the GRPC ballroom before most of the people came in:

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This is it with some of the attendees:

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GRPC Post 1

September 28, 2012 / / 0 Comments

So I managed to make it into the hotel, which was a bit onerous. GPS’s are great tools, but mine decided I arrived when I crossed onto the airport.

I can see why people are concerned about carrying here. The hotel is literally above the terminal. I’m actually typing this out on a little balcony that overlooks one of the terminals. I’m good as long as I stay in the hotel. One escalator ride, and I’m committing a felony.

Here’s a pic from my balcony using Apple’s new panorama feature:

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Going down to the floor is forbidden while I have all my toys.

I managed to meet up with Kenn Blanchard of the Urban Shooter podcast. I’ll probably be hanging out with him a lot of the time. Now to find a place to smoke cigars.

I Don’t Care About the Truth, Let Me Tell My Damn Story!

September 27, 2012 / / 0 Comments

So this summer one of my friends gave me this:

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So now I have a fake land mine to play with. There was real temptation to put it out front when the lawn guy showed up. Or when the Jehovah’s Witnesses are running around the neighborhood.

Now, I remember getting the mine as such:

My brother and I are at his house awaiting our friend so we could go see Dark Knight Rising. Friend comes in and holds up fake mine.

Me: “Cool, a land mine.”

Brother: “I don’t know what is more disturbing, that (Friend) has a land mine or that my brother knows what it is.”

My brother has since informed me that me recollection of the event was faulty. I don’t give a damn. My story is better, and that’s all that counts. Maybe. I think. Damn.